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Emily, Sawyer and Lidia. A major part of my HEART! |
There is a new symptom to this getting old thing, ladies. Remember our talk about aging gracefully? If not, you can read about it right here. Well, a wise woman once told me that it was possibly not over, yet. Glory have mercy she was so right. I'm in a funk.
The new symptom is called The Weeps. Much like 'The Mood', The Weeps will creep up on you when you least expect it. I mean, you live all these years knowing that life changes. You've experience multitudes, yet when certain changes come, they will throw you into an all out weep fest. There should be labels and warnings about such things. If you're experiencing similar feelings, let me just go ahead and tell you, I'm here for you. You are not alone. I've been in a weep fest for a couple of weeks now. Let me explain......
Have you ever wondered why we only get maybe 20 good years with our children? I understand that part of our job is to raise them up and give them wings. But I don't understand why it hurts so bad when they leave. You spend the better part of your youthful years raising and getting attached to the little buggers and then they up and leave some 20 years down the road. I mean, isn't there a switch or something you can turn on or off? It's a mystery.
Anyway, I almost had to go to the insane asylum when my youngest daughter,Whitney, got married and moved to Denver. I'm still not over that one and she's been gone for 2 years. My oldest daughter, Emily, hasn't lived at home for nearly 10 years. But, she has lived next door for the majority of that time. She is the mother to my two precious grandchildren. I've never thought about her and the children living anywhere but next door to me. Well, as life would have it, Emily is going through some changes of her own. She will be moving to the upstate and starting a new job in two weeks. OMG, I can hardly stand it. That means my two precious grandchildren, Lidia and Sawyer, will not be an almost daily part of my life.
Oh Lord, here come The Weeps!
See! See what I told you! They creep up when you least expect it. Excuse me a moment, please. Sniff.
Alright, I'm back. I'm ok for now. But, let's just say I'm afraid it's going to be a dark time for awhile as I adjust to this new change in my life. My daughter totally deserves this. I support her and am very happy for her. And, I am going to miss my grandchildren like crazy. They are going into a great situation with lots of people around them that love them and will look out for them. Still, it's not easy. I will make it through this change.......maybe not unscathed. 'The Weeps' seem to have taken root or something. But, who's perfect anyway? All I know for sure right now is that I will be traveling to the upstate a lot in the future. I look forward to weekends with LaLa and summers at the beach. Good thing my daughter's new home has room for me, too. Lidia is already planning the addition to her bedroom with a secret room....all for me. Lord how I love that child!
Hmmm, just had a thought....sleepovers in the upstate. Now that sounds like an interesting post, doesn't it?
So, here we are....a new dimension to aging gracefully and it's called The Weeps. And then there are the life changes; mostly good and necessary. Hard to swallow at times, but thank goodness we learn to adjust. I still don't like change very much. Unfair....you're darn right. But most likely, it's just me being selfish. So maybe instead of looking at it as 'my children leaving the nest and me', I need to look at it more like I accomplished the job of raising the two extremely intelligent, caring and compassionate girls entrusted to me, to the best of my ability. I have no doubt that my girls and grandchildren will make a difference in this world. If that is true and I believe it is, then the 'children leaving the nest' will be my greatest success.
Take that, Weeps!
And maybe, just maybe, growing old can be done gracefully after all.
Til soon,
Laurie